For some reason the people at my church have seen fit to let me teach the 3rd/4th grade Sunday school class. They must not be aware how much I revel in silliness.

Strictness and silliness are necessities in a class with two kids who speak mostly Russian and two more who don’t read yet (plus assorted others). We can’t just sit quietly on our folding chairs and read the Bible. Anyway the Bible is boring in lots of places.

Yesterday’s lesson was on the angels visiting the shepherds when Jesus was born. We were kind of acting it out as we went along. We were all grouchy tax collectors, hugely pregnant women, and sleepy shepherds. I mentioned that the sheep probably knew something weird was going on before the shepherds did. The kids milled around and nudged each other and went “BAAAA” a lot.

It was one of those moments. Ten children in my charge bearing an uncanny resemblance to sheep. How did I get such a funny life?

So then we got to the part where the shepherds are really scared of the angels, and I asked the students why they were scared. Suddenly I was trapped in a conversation about what angels look like.

“Girls with blond hair and wings!”
“No, they’re guys! Guys in dresses!” (snicker snicker)
“They are really bright, like the sun, that’s scary!”
“Maybe they have weapons!”
“Yeah, they have masks and ninja weapons!”
“They are ghosts, scary ghosts!”

“You’re all correct,” I said. “Angels are shiny, blond-haired, cross-dressing ninja ghosts.”*

Every week as we put away our props and crafts and pencils I wonder what they tell their parents about class. “What’d you learn today, honey?” “I learned how to be a nervous sheep!” They demonstrate by body-slamming their siblings and saying “Baaaaa” as loudly and plaintively as possible. That little game will last the whole car ride home.

*Just kidding.

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