Sun 15 Apr 2007
My parents, like everybody’s, probably did a lot of things raising me that messed me up in one way or another (Hi, Mom! Hi Dad!). When I was a kid I was sure that one of those things was my mom’s health food crusade. At its peak, chocolate and sugar were banned from the house in favor of honey, carob, and fruit juice. I remember the fruit roll-ups fad that swept the elementary school when we were not allowed to have fruit roll-ups. Instead, my mom made all-natural fruit puree and put it in the food dehydrator on a cookie tray, then cut the resulting stiff, brown sheet into rectangles. It actually tasted pretty good, but I was swept with debilitating lunchroom shame, gnawing a thick, diarrhea-colored piece of apricot-pear puree instead of peeling a real fruit roll-up off of the wrapper in long strips and wrapping it around my finger. I was sure I was scarred forever.
Of course, that doesn’t seem so bad these days, from the long perspective the years provide. I never buy fruit roll-ups; when I see them going for 99 cents in the produce section of the store I think, “That’s just sugar and food coloring! Rip-off!” Another thing I used to complain about, Easter Sunday, now seems downright idyllic. The night before Easter, we’d put carrots in our shoes for the easter bunny, which he would mysteriously replace in the night with a brightly colored easter egg. Before church, we’d search the house for carefully hidden baskets. Then we’d put on our frilliest dresses and lace-edged ankle socks and shiny white shoes (or a suit and clip on tie, in the case of my brother) and head off to Easter Mass. My dad and I were both lectors, so once in awhile I got the chance to read from the Bible in front of the whole church. I loved singing the Easter hymns, especially “Joyful, Joyful.” After Mass, we’d head home for an age-graded easter egg hunt and a feast of handed down family recipes, usually prepared by my dad.
The point of contention in the family was the content of the Easter baskets themselves. If my mom had had her way, they would have contained only trail mix, carob malt balls, sugar free gum and travel games. My dad’s influence meant we each got a big chocolate bunny to eat bit by bit over the course of a week or so. But trail mix? It just seemed so… lame. So un-Eastery! How could we possibly celebrate the day with peanuts and raisins? There was a fair amount of eye-rolling. Scarred for life, my siblings and I suggested to each other. The deprivation! The utter lack of sugar! It was downright un-American!
Last Sunday my mom and I were reminiscing together about the good old days, which I now miss. She is still the most health-conscious person that I know, but she has mellowed quite a bit since my elementary school years. The subject of carob came up and she laughed. “It’s a good thing I’m not that way anymore,” she said. “Yes, mom,” I said, “But I don’t get to benefit from it since you no longer give me Easter baskets!” This weekend a heavy package arrived in the mail. it was a wall sconce, brim-full of chocolates and jelly beans. “A real, adult Easter basket,” read the note. A sweet gift, in more ways than one. I called my mom to thank her. She had a confession to make: the jelly beans were sugar-free. She insists she didn’t notice it until it came time to rip open the package, but I wonder…
April 16th, 2007 at 10:23 am
I thought I’d add another relic to your nostalgic reminiscing…, “Not fair! You got an Easter basket and I didn’t!”
April 16th, 2007 at 10:31 pm
Relic #2: I remember getting plastic trolls without pants. Big ones, little ones, rockstars, surfers. I even got to make a little box to hold all the extras for them.
April 17th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
Awww. . . I’m mortally jealous of people my age who continue to receive Easter baskets.
April 17th, 2007 at 10:31 pm
Shannon– I guess I must have a prettier phone voice or something.
Gavin– I don’t remember those, but I’ll take your word for it.
Julie– It was an unusual event, therefore worth blogging about….
April 18th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
My mom was MUCH the same way when I was growing up. I used to think, “I will DEFINITELY let my kids drink Kool-Aid when I’m a grown-up.” -insert loud buzzer sound here- No way. That’s just sugar, artificial color & flavor. No flippin’ way. Same with the ubiquitous pouches of “fruit snackies” that masquerade as something healthy, made of 5% fruit juice, 90% sugar, and 5% gelatin (or something), color and flavor.
As a kid, we had no white bread. Wheat germ sprinkled on everything. No Twinkies. No TV, either. An my parents didn’t care a whit for what everyone else’s parents were letting their kids do, even my best friend, whose dad was a pastor. I thought surely I’d be scarred for life. Now, though, I’m glad for (at least that part of) my upbringing.
For the second time, this year, we didn’t even do Easter baskets for the kids. We did dye eggs, though. The kids were just getting WAY too wrapped up in Easter-as-another-gift-receiving-holiday and I take a fairly dim view of that. We may do baskets next year, though.
April 19th, 2007 at 8:55 am
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! I love that kind of story.
And I was just complaining to someone what an unreasonable hard-ass (about food) my sis-in-law is… And how she was probably scarring her kids. And then I read your blog entry. Just as I deserved.
Watch out for those sugar-free treats, though. They give a lot of people the runs (tmi).
April 24th, 2007 at 8:53 pm
Karen– wow, that is eerily similar. Ah, the 1970’s.
Kate– thanks, I’ll remember that.