Wed 26 Sep 2007
House Drama
Posted by Erin under Daily Life
[10] Comments
So, the sellers hired a general handyman with an apparent IQ of 65, or the work ethic of a grouchy llama, to make most of our requested repairs on the house. Some of his handywork:
Stuccoing over the hinges of a new door
Stuccoing a nearby treetrunk (or at least cleaning his tools off on it)
Causing a leak in a toilet that wasn’t there before
Putting one large dark tile in the middle of a sea of cream-colored tiles
Setting up the bathroom plumbing so that both the tub faucet and the showerhead run simultaneously. In both bathrooms.
One bathroom that used to work fine now has no hot/cold.
Filling holes in the siding with putty that has since dried and shrunk, instead of patching the holes.
Creating a new hole in the wall where he tried to install a new doorbell.
He has been let loose unsupervised in our future house for 45 days; who knows what other treats we will discover!
Thank goodness they used a real electrician and HVAC installer to take care of the really dangerous stuff.
Suspenseful question of the moment: Will We Close Tomorrow as Scheduled?
UPDATE*****
Superrealtor comes to the rescue! Our realtor, Becky Shaw, aka Ms Damage Control, got on the phone and sorted everything out in an hour. We are switching from the seller’s contractor to one selected by her, who guarantees his work. He will fax over an estimate and we’ll leave that that plus 1000 for unforseen issues in escrow. He will clear his schedule and work all day Thursday and Friday to re-do the bad stuff and finish the incomplete stuff. We will move in as scheduled on Saturday. Rock on.

Oh my goodness!!! That’s awful!
When do you guys have to be out of your current place?
Erin! I’m so sorry . . . I hope they’re willing to accept responsibility for this. We’ve had really great help and really terrible help on our house too (we’re STILL repairing damage from one day with our first repairman and his drug-addled helper).
Updated comment*****
YAY!!!
Holy crap! That is some SERIOUSLY messed up handy-manning going on there. We have a really good one, but I don’t guess he’d like to commute to AZ for jobs.
Wish we could be there to help you move…wouldn’t that be fun? Instead, on Saturday we’re getting on a Lufthansa flight bound for Italy! Yahoo!!!
Good news!!! All the best to you as you move in to YOUR NEW HOME. Hooray!
Wow, what a bad-news, good-news post!!!!
Holy crap indeed!! The ineptitude of the “handyman” is hard to believe. Goodness.
I would volunteer my hubby to help you move. We like to help people move!! But, our Saturday is jam-packed already. Sunday might work, but it’d have to be in the evening.
And I didn’t know you were using Becky!! She’s such a fantastic realtor.
Sarah, if you see my brother in Rome or Tuscany, wave to him. have a fun trip.
Karen, thanks for the offer, but we will be hanging out with guests on Sunday evening… you were one of the ten people who recommended Becky to us, btw. But if you know someone who would have fun helping us design our landscaping, lemme know.
Thanks for all the good wishes from everybody else. Let the homeowner games begin!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! (you *will* laugh someday!!!)
It is mandatory, I think, that all new homeowners watch The Money Pit. Move it to the front of the line on your Netflicks thingy.
We had a landlord once…..we called him and said that the stove he bought to replace the dead one did not fit in the stove slot. He fixed that. He came over and sawed off the end of my counter and drawer and cabinet. Just hacked off the end of my knotty pine cabinet right before my eyes!!!! I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry or hide the children. Sigh. We still look at each other and marvel and laugh really hard about the shock of it.
If you want professional help, I hightly recommend Julie Damon at Landscapemart/McKeown. Phone is 602.889.4700. I just called to make sure she still works there, and she does. They have a unique office/showroom/show-frontyard and show-backyard at 80th Ave & Thunderbird that you can roam around in.
If you’re looking for nonprofessional help, I’d love to help at least choose plants with you!!! My biggest “thing” is choosing native plants as much as possible. They grow better with less fuss, look better, last longer, use less water, etc. You can come see my front yard, if you’d like. We need to have y’all over for dinner anyways.
Rubber Chicken Girl– I will dutifully move The Money Pit to the top of the queue. Gratuitous sawing of cabinetry is perfect, I’m suprised my guy didn’t try that just for fun….
Karen– yes, i’d love to walk through your yard with you sometime and hear how you made your decisions. We already went through the botanical gardens taking pictures and getting ideas, that was fun. we are very xeriscape minded. My problem is that I can’t adjust to the scale of a sprawling (to us) ranch house and corner lot. I am used to postage stamp yards and narrow rooms stacked on top of each other, so my tastes and ideas run to small spaces.